Thursday, January 22, 2009

A Moment To Truly Reflect...

Aaahhh...I have found a moment of time alone and the house all to myself! I am loving my time here, but haven't had too much time alone. As an introvert at heart, I need more time than most people by myself. I love people, but I definitely need time to be rejuvenated, to write, to think, and to just be. Where do I begin? Wow, there is so much to reflect on these past few days.

Time here has flown by and there are so many new things to discover. My brain is like a sponge just soaking every moment in every chance I get. I keep pinching myself in unbelief that I have the amazing opportunity to be here. I am falling in love with this place and am so hungry. At home, I don't find much time to just sit still and learn new things. I feel like I am always, "Go, go, go!" I just want time to sit and learn! This is why I am so thankful to be here.

My heart is opening as if it were once a "garden locked up..." as the Word says in Song of Solomon. Just today, I had an idea of writing a children's book similar to the "Dora the Explorer" books. Yet my book would have more of an emphasis on languages all around the world, specifically more difficult ones. The characters would also travel to amazing countries and would be from many places.

It appears that I am being awakened again to my love for children. This doesn't mean I will be in the children's ministry any time soon with my church, but I am starting to see that a love for teaching children is still in my heart. You see, I have felt like it has been dormant for quite awhile.

However, God is showing me that it was never asleep, but always there because He placed it in my heart. He has given me a gift to work with children and I have always known this, but tried to run from it many times. I don't know what this means for me in the future, but I do know that children, and fatherless children, in particular, are going to be an integral part of my life.

I am also learning how to raise them in the way they should go in a foreign country. As an American in a foreign land, there are many challenges one must overcome and face. I came here to learn about this culture, to see what God is doing here, but also to help with this precious little girl and boy.

I am starting to see that God is in the deepest part of me in the day to day chores, changing the diapers, teaching letters, teaching Bible stories, teaching how to praise Jesus. I can practice the presence of God in these day to day situations and He will meet with me. He is truly my Great Reward through everything!

I am realizing how much I have missed it, being with children day to day. There is so much joy to be found in my heart when I'm around them. Wow, I just don't know what else to write, except that my heart is full. It feels full of the joy of the Lord! My cup overfloweth...

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